O.J. Simpson-Anthony Weiner "Dream Team" Investigative Partnership Off, for Now
Last week, following his revelation that someone had hacked into his computer, and sent fake photographs of his bulging underwear from his Twitter account to various young women, Cong. Anthony Weiner (D-NY) announced the formation of a detective partnership with widowed NFL Hall of Famer O.J. Simpson.
“Congressman Weiner and I have both been the victims of criminals and smear campaigns, and we both wish to clear our names. Therefore, we are going to partner up, and do just that. He is going to hunt down the person or persons who murdered my wife, Nicole, and I am going to hunt down the hacker who did this to him,” announced Simpson via a telephone press conference, from prison.
Simpson, who is serving a sentence of up to 33 years for kidnapping and armed robbery at Nevada's Lovelock Correctional Center, planned on having associates of his not presently in prison do the gumshoe work.
After Cong. Weiner’s press conference on Monday, in which he admitted that he had not been hacked, and had in fact himself sent the Twitter pictures to young women, Simpson released a terse statement regarding the partnership: “It’s over.”
Simpson could be released as early as 2017. At present, no criminal charges have been laid against Weiner.
Award-winning, New York-based freelancer Nicholas Stix founded A Different Drummer magazine (1989-93). Stix has written for Die Suedwest Presse, New York Daily News, New York Post, Newsday, Middle American News, Toogood Reports, Insight, Chronicles, the American Enterprise, Campus Reports, VDARE, the Weekly Standard, Front Page Magazine, Ideas on Liberty, National Review Online and the Illinois Leader. His column also appears at Men's News Daily, MichNews, Intellectual Conservative, Enter Stage Right and OpinioNet. Stix has studied at colleges and universities on two continents, and earned a couple of sheepskins, but he asks that the reader not hold that against him. His day jobs have included washing pots, building Daimler-Benzes on the assembly-line, tackling shoplifters and teaching college, but his favorite job was changing his son's diapers.